I have made a mess and I don’t know what to do. When I am lost I like to get out in nature away from everything and everyone and spend time alone with the Lord. On Saturday I decided to take a drive north to try to find some snow. I was sure I knew […]
Christ Chose Me
Today I found myself gazing out of my window looking at the beauty surrounding me and lamenting that here I am alone. That for every relationship that I have found myself in throughout my adult life, it came down to that person choosing someone or something else instead of me. Maybe it is my choices […]
The Court or the Diamond
I am on the road, and even though each week I try to find a church to attend in the town I’m in, there is still a desire to be connected to my home church. It is such a wonderful thing to be able to open the website and listen to the sermon from wherever […]
The Wonder in the Wisps
For only $1.00 (+.30 for shipping) I was going to be the proud owner of sea monkeys! I painstakingly filled out the order form, counted my money and expertly sealed it inside the carefully addressed envelope. As a last-minute safety measure, I placed a piece of scotch tape over the seal of the envelope to […]
Is There Salt On your Pretzel
Interesting fun fact. In 1946 James Stauffer Herr bought a small potato chip company from two cousins in Lancaster Pennsylvania. My grandfather was one of those cousins. Through the years they became a leader in the potato chip industry. In 1981 Herr’s began producing pretzels. Their Sourdough are my favorite, they are thicker than the […]
Is Your Foundation in Christ?
Yesterday I drove along the coast of Florida, up through Port St. Joseph, Panama City, and the surrounding coastal towns. It breaks my heart to think of all the people there who were affected by Hurricane Michael. Houses crushed down to the foundation, family heirlooms and mementos ripped away by the rushing water, and truck […]
They Say Change Comes in Waves
The beach in the off season is not very crowded, or at least it wasn’t today which gave me opportunity to walk, and think, and appreciate, and pray. At one point I found myself calf deep in the surf as wave after wave splashed to shore. There is peace in the lapping of the waves […]
When the Road Gets Rough
It is not always easy to turn this rig around and sometimes I just have to keep on going until I find a place that I can safely exit the highway and turn my motorhome back the way it is supposed to go. Yesterday as I was driving through a small town in NC I […]
We really are all the same
Giiiiirrrrrl! Yep, I am in the south. The weather is warmer and so are the people. It is interesting how differently people present themselves depending on the area of the country in which they live. Anyone who has traveled knows this to be true. As a general rule, the south is friendly, the northeast is […]
Go Ye Therefore
This weekend, a group of men and women will be taking the time during one of their meetings to honor my father for his part in building and growing the ministry, but more so for his part in helping to grow the kingdom of God. When we received the invitation to attend this service, it […]
But Still You Will Grow
“Your life will shake in the process of maturing into the person God intends.” Peter Scazzero Remember when you were still a child and every once in a while, you would find yourself doubled over in pain, or feeling discomfort within your body that had no visible source? I do. I remember well the day […]
The Hairs on my Head
I remember as a child sitting quietly beside my dad on the couch talking. I don’t remember the conversation, but I do remember how the conversation made me feel. I remember feeling so important and knowing in that moment that my dad loved me – and I think my little seven year old heart was […]
The Little Island of Crete
Last night was the last softball game of the season and though we played well, we did not make the win; thus ending our presence in the playoffs. But boy did we have fun this season! We had a great group of men and women on the team and throughout each and every game there […]
Hidden in the Walls
I have recently had opportunity to share some childhood stories that have brought some surprised looks, questioning glances, and straight out laughter. One story in particular consistently brings a shaking of the head from the person to which it is told and it is fun to watch the reactions after the tale has been completed. […]
What Do You Long For?
I think one of the coolest things about our trip out west last month was the stark contrast between the rocky brown mountains and the deep blue sky. This picture does not do it justice but as we traveled I found myself over and over again staring in awe and snapping pictures in an attempt […]
Around the next curve
Last fall my sister and brother in law introduced me to something new. Mountain biking, I had heard the stories and seen the resulting injuries of those who, as adults have taken up this sport; so I was a little uncertain as we mounted the bikes for that first ride. It was short lived, not […]
To Be Like Her
I think I was about thirteen, but I remember it well. I stood leaning on the laundry room door watching as my mom was working with my sister on an art project. It was looking really good. They were working together on a painting of the spaceship Challenger, capturing the image of takeoff perfectly. It […]
A Reflection of Christ
We all do it, to some degree or another, at some time or another, we all take a message we have been given and try to manage it instead of just receive it. When we were kids we spent one month each summer camping. Oh what fun we always had. The memories of spending time […]
Wisdom and Strength
Isn’t it funny – or maybe funny isn’t the right word – that it is so difficult sometimes to ask for help. It is almost like we think that if we ask for help somehow we have failed at the task, or that we are an inconvenience, or that we aren’t strong enough to work […]
What are you doing with it?
How are you preparing for Memorial Day weekend? Are you packing your bags for a much anticipated trip? Are you preparing yourself for a family reunion that you are either excited about or dreading? Or is it just another weekend with an extra day off for everyone but you? Most of us don’t feel the […]
A Fruitful Life
Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control. Have you ever joyfully picked up an apple, shined it, looked it over to find the perfect starting point and the moment you chomped down been greeted by a foul and rotten taste? The apple looked so good from the outside, deep red shiny perfect […]
Freedom in Forgiveness
It is almost yard sale season, the time of year when I can get rid of things I no longer need or want and then go buy someone else’s things they no longer need or want. Actually, I enjoy having yard sales, it isn’t really about getting money – though that is a bonus. But […]
Don’t Stop There
Have you ever been to the Rocky Mountains? The drive from the east is not all that exciting, in fact at times it feels endless. The trek across the boring brown featureless landscape that is Kansas is a sure opportunity to fight road hypnosis for hours on end. But then all of a sudden you […]
Blessed Assurance
I am sure we have all seen the ads for the buyer assurance protection plans, we all pay insurance on our vehicles and belongings (at least I hope we do), and we likely look for the warranty or some guarantee that what we invest in will be protected. It is pretty sad when you stop […]
The Foundation of your Past
Everything changes, that is the beautiful thing about life. Though not every change is beautiful, every change is important for growth. This weekend my sisters and are spending some time in Lynchburg, VA, a place we all went to college. It is neat to be here but so much has changed! There are shopping centers […]
A Moment to Heal
Today is Valentine’s Day. A day filled with love and romance for those who are involved with a special someone. It is sweet to see all the smiling faces, the flowers, and the boxes of chocolate. It makes my heart happy. Those of you who know me know that I don’t really believe in dating, […]
I Might Need it Someday
Over the years I have acquired a lot of stuff. I’d like to say I know how I got it all but there are some things that, as I am going through closets and cupboards I can’t figure out how it came to be in my possession. In many cases I don’t even know what […]
My Heart’s Desire
Psalm 37:4 is one of those verses that you find on coffee mugs, keychains, cell phone covers, pillows, you name it and you can likely find it. It is a verse used as encouragement to the hurting, and to give hope in moments when a person is feeling hopeless. “Delight yourselves in the Lord and […]
It is a Temporary Home
When I moved into this house I knew it was a temporary home, I knew that I would not retire in this house and now it is time to pack up my belongings and move on. I have lived in this temporary home for thirteen years. As I begin to pack up the things in […]
Growth in Experience
Last night was President Trump’s first State of the Union address. I don’t want to get political here but I noticed a couple of things about our President as I sat watching and listening to him speak. He has changed a great deal in the last year. He has become more refined and more presidential. […]
A Healing Anger
I am one of those people to whom dates have significance. Even in my subconscious mind I recognize upcoming momentous days and without intention begin to feel the weight or excitement of those days in advance. This morning I am sitting in my room missing my dad. I need his wisdom, I need his encouragement, […]
Angry
I am angry. I have finally admitted to myself and to God that I am angry, angry to my very core.
What is Your Earthly Destination?
I enjoy road trips. They can be exciting experiences in themselves, with stops along the way and opportunities to find adventure or view unique sights only found in the town or state that you are passing through. The best road trips are those that are not on a set schedule, where each day is a […]
God Took Them Home
I vividly remember the moment that my mom sat down and told us that she had been diagnosed with brain tumors. I distinctly recall the myriad of emotions and thoughts that struck me in that moment. Denial not the least of these. Even though I had time to process the reality that mom was leaving […]
Who is Your Boogeyman?
Are you familiar with the children’s show VeggieTales? If you are, maybe you remember the song God Is Bigger Than the Boogey Man. (I have it linked below) the lyrics go like this, God is bigger than the boogie man, He’s bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on tv – oh God is bigger than […]
Happy New Year!
2017 was both incredible and extremely difficult. As I sit and reflect these last few hours I have to stop and smile, because through all the experiences of the past 12 months, I know that God has used and is using each and every one of them as preparation for what is to come next […]
We Have A Direct Connection
Do you remember when telephones were connected to a wall? Do you remember even further back to party lines and switchboards? We have come a long way with our ability to communicate with each other, between telephones, email, text messages, cell phones, even video phones there are multiple ways to connect with those we want […]
I’m Tired of Being Ordinary
I had a pretty good childhood. Full of adventure, love, acceptance, and instruction in the Lord. My dad was a pastor and we moved a lot. I think this is why we all, (my brothers and sisters and I) are pretty close as adults. We relied on each other for friendships with each move, until […]
How Is This Going To Help?
Hebrews 11:1 – Now faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of the things we do not see. I come from a large family, there are six of us kids. All born within seven years and eleven days of each other. I remember asking my mom one day if they did […]
The Johnny Jumper Got Stuck
Do you remember the Johnny Jumpers? Those cool little bouncy seats that you attach to a door frame for your baby to bounce it. Boy did I love our Johnny Jumper. Each of my children loved the freedom they found with each jump as they kicked their little legs and soared up a solid two […]
To Who do you Trust Your Life?
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life. Psalm 143:8 I have read this verse over and over this morning hoping that something profound and meaningful would come into my head […]
The Reality of My Right Now
It is interesting how God opens up understanding of Scripture the more we read it. Today I began reading Matthew, I am quite certain I have read this many times in the past but today I received a very different message than I ever have before. Can you imagine how Joseph must have felt as […]
The Bags Were Too Heavy
When I was in my early teens our family moved to a little town on Vancouver Island, it was a peaceful, beautiful little town with the ocean on one side and a stunning forest on the other. Back then there was not a whole lot going on around us. We had tourists in the summer […]
God’s Healing Grace
The purpose of this site is to talk about healing and hope. As I have gone back through the posts from the past, I found myself removing a large number of my earlier laments because, rather than bring encouragement even now reading them brought discouragement. I am no longer in that place of emotional distress […]
The Renewal in Waiting
What does it mean to wait? Why is it so easy to wait on some things but so painfully difficult to wait on others? I confess, I am not the best at waiting. I put on a good face and pretend to be, but inside I can become anxious and impatient for things to happen. […]
A Hopeful Memory Walk
Tonight I walked along the street The darkness all around I thought of you and watched my tears disappear there on the ground. I strolled alone along the road remembering your love I felt your presence ever near And your strength from up above. I pondered too the lessons learned throughout my life with you […]
The Unbroken
There is a brokenness out of which comes the unbroken, a shatteredness out of which blooms the unshatterable. There is a sorrow beyond all grief which leads to joy and a fragility out of whose depths emerges strength. There is a hollow space too vast for words through which we pass with each loss, out […]
There is No Fear in Love
1 John 4:18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear. As a child it was not uncommon for me to come home after some mischievous adventure only to find my dad sitting at the dining room table waiting for me to confess to him what he already knew. Somehow in […]
Rest for the Soul
Psalm 46:10, “Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” Go in any Christian bookstore and you will see the phrase “Be still and know that I am God” on everything from Bible covers, to coffee mugs, to pencils and wall […]
The Heart is not a DIY
It’s not that I don’t like doctors, or even that I don’t like going to doctors. What I don’t like is that it seems that often, by the time I finally get an appointment and go, I am feeling better. So in the end I just spent $50 so sit in a small windowless room […]
Letting Go of the Controls
Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails, and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. […]
The Chaos in my Plan
When I was around eight or nine I sat down and made my life plan. I was going to get married, have six children, five boys and one girl and give birth to my first child before I was 22. I was going to have a happy life filled with adventure, laughter, love, and perfection. […]
The Other Side
For years I lived a double life. Not a 007 kind of double life, (although sometimes I think that would be fun!) but a life full of lies and hidden hurts. For many years I was trapped in an abusive relationship and didn’t want anyone to know about it so I pretended everything was fine. […]
Do You Know Love?
Our society has a pretty messed up and warped idea of what love really is. Just turn on any television show, open a book, or even listen to the lyrics of your favorite song and you will see that it is all about sex. So much of what is being marketed to our youth is […]
The Intimacy in Connection
*Yesterday I had a conversation with a young man who is in his senior year of high school. He is the star player on the basketball team and has been recruited by multiple colleges. But as I was speaking to him I realized he was filled with a deep sadness that he is very good […]
That is a Lot to Give
Have you ever given your time to something, or for something that you believed in? Perhaps you volunteered to serve at a soup kitchen or for a political candidate? Or maybe something that you care about and felt excited to be a part of? Have you ever given your time for something that you didn’t […]
Whatever is True
At my core, I am an optimist. I look for the good in situations and the good in people as often as possible. It is hard for me to hold on to an idea that something good won’t come from a troublesome experience. For the most part. I think we all have moments when seeing […]
The Bully Can’t Win
When I was about ten years old my sister and I were playing at a playground in our small town when some bigger boys came over to us and started calling us names. My sister, a whole year older than me, was not going to let them bully me so she began defending us. Without […]
The Weight of the Burden
Camping is something I truly enjoy. Unfortunately, it is not something I often have opportunity to do right now, but I do hope as life settles a little that will change. My favorite camping trip was with a group of friends in Virginia. We all loaded up our backpacks with as much as we could […]
Growth Welcomed
God is Good. His plan is for our good and never our harm. Every joyful moment, every painful moment, every mistake and every success are all part of His greater plan to make us more like Jesus. Hurting is not fun. But just as a child has growing pains, our emotional pain is an instrument […]
Domestic Violence Awareness
October is Domestic Violence Awareness month. I am not sure when October became the month we work to raise awareness of this horrible epidemic but I only learned of it last year. It is wonderful that we as a society are finally recognizing that there are men and women across the globe who are battling every […]
Where Do You Go to Seek Wisdom?
It is hard to know how to move forward in certain circumstances. The answers are just naturally not within us. Go into any bookstore today and you will find whole sections of how to books. How to fix cars, how to win friends and influence people, how to be happy, how to be successful. Self […]
What is Righteousness
And the effect of righteousness will be peace, and the result of righteousness, quietness and trust forever. Isaiah 32:17 This was the verse of the day that popped up on my phone this morning. I think I read it seventeen times before I looked it up in another translation. I can’t exactly put my finger […]
Against my Nature
I wouldn’t say I am a risk taker. Not in the common sense of the term. But lately the Lord has been moving and working in my life in ways that are hard to explain. He has given me a confidence in His plan for my future, regardless of what goes on around me. He […]
The Line on the Page
When I was eight years old I made a list of will do’s, might do’s, and will never do’s. I remember the day very well, in fact I can even recall the smells around me when I think of it. On a piece of paper I carefully drew a straight line across the center of […]
Life In Six Words
My soul doth magnify the Lord. Luke 1:46 Six words filled with purpose. It has always baffled me a little how easy it was for Mary to accept the words of the angel of the Lord when he came to her and told her she would carry the Messiah. God had a purpose for her […]
Hardship
The goal after hardship is to come out better than you were before. Hardships will come, and when they do, they come with pain and struggle. The emotional and physical toll can be overwhelming for a time. But it doesn’t have to be permanent. Sometimes healing occurs quickly and you feel relief, sometimes healing happens […]
Something to Cry About
Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about. I have three children and I am sure I said this this to them more often than I remember. I never really thought about what this statement communicated or what this could do to the idea of being safe to speak about feelings and sadness. […]
The Opportunity Within Difficulty
We have likely all heard a version of this saying – Every cloud has a silver lining. When you are facing a difficulty don’t give up! Don’t get down on yourself. Find the opportunity that’s hidden within whatever difficulty you’re facing, and see how you can make the most out of it. What a difference […]
The Danger in the Stronghold
The idea of a stronghold is certainly a good one if you look at it from the perspective of protection. Historically a stronghold was described as fortress or a castle, in modern day we have more advanced structures that are used for physical protection. An ideological stronghold is a place where a particular cause or […]
I Prefer to be Safe
As I am continuing the study involving self reflection, the next question asks – What do you prefer? This is a tough one. I mean there are a lot of things I prefer that don’t impact my day to day – or life in general. Recognizing that I had to dig a little deeper I […]
What Do You Value?
Once again I find myself in a study that asks tough questions. Questions that involve real thought and reflection. I am working through these questions and want to share them with you. The first question I have pondered is What do I value? I value family and relationships. I value experiences and adventure. I value […]
The Fear in the Truth
I would say that I value honesty above almost all else. In relationships, in friendships, and in the day to day. I remember one day while I was at work and one of the staff mentioned that a client was trying to reach me and would be calling back. I don’t remember why I was […]
Will You Jump?
Jenni stood at the edge of the cliff looking down into the water at her dad and uncle who were both waiting patiently for her to jump. But she was frozen. Try as she might she could not force her body to take that leap of faith and fall to the water below. I think […]
The Gift That Keeps on Giving
At fifteen years old my daughter wanted a cell phone more than anything. All her friends had one, her older sister had one, it seemed to her that everyone but her had a cell phone. So she began hinting around about what kind of device she would like if she were to get one. After […]
Stay on the Path
I was so excited, it had been over a month since I had really been home and seen my friends. All week we looked forward to a relaxing evening out in the country away from the noise and chaos of the city, and then it rained. This has been a wet summer so far so […]
Do You Hope For Someone?
What does it mean to hope for someone? I know we have all had moments where we have hoped for a special gift, or a prize, even waited anxiously for a positive test result. Hope is a good thing and it is an indicator of positive thoughts and feelings. But what does it mean to […]
You Are Not Broken Beyond Repair
Have you ever been truly broken. I mean – down on the ground shattered in a thousand pieces, without the strength to even lift your head up to look for help – broken? Have you ever searched in vain for a tiny piece of your world that may have survived? Have you ever found yourself […]
Just Be Still
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10 It is hard to be still. I am not talking about physical stillness, although that is a struggle all it’s own especially as a single mom and a person with responsibilities. Being physically still is a luxury that often, I don’t have time to experience. […]
The Promise in Growth
“Your life will shake in the process of maturing into the person God intends.” Peter Scazzero Remember when you were still a child and every once in a while you would find yourself doubled over in pain, or feeling discomfort within your body that had no visible source? I do. I remember well the day […]
Kindness in the Sternness
My dad was, in some people’s opinion, pretty strict. He had expectations of us that at times seemed pretty high. They really weren’t unreasonable, but they were higher than some of my friends’ parents expectations of them. As is the case with most families, we also had a number of rules. Some rules you just […]
Fearfully and Wonderfully Made
God has created us with a depth that we just can’t even fathom. Last night I had the opportunity to observe a horse Therapy Program with some children. What a beautiful experience. The session included two groups of children, each group with different levels of struggle. Both were interesting to observe but the second group […]
Who Are You Trying to Impress
Today I randomly jumped back into a book I have not picked up in a few weeks and opened to a page that was exactly what I needed to read. The section is on living faithful to your true self. If you have been following these writings you will know that the past twelve years […]
We Want Freedom
It is Independence Day in the United States, the anniversary of the day in 1776 when The Declaration of Independence was adopted by the Continental Congress. We had declared our freedom from the oppressive governing powers of Great Britain. On that day in 1776 America cried out – “We want Freedom!” When I look around […]
Are You Listening
Active listening is not a strength for many people. In fact, the skill of listening is often completely lacking. I think it’s fun to sit in the restaurant and watch the people around me interact with one another during the meal. There’s always that one table with the couple sitting staring off, each lost in […]
The Big Picture
It is naive to believe that the person the Lord has for you will bring with them a relationship without conflict. Conflict is part of life, in all areas of life, including relationships. A certain amount of conflict in a relationship is not a bad thing, in fact when conflict is handled appropriately it can […]
A Beautiful Evening
A group of friends, delicious food, a gorgeous sunset, a bonfire and fireworks. That is how this day ended. Sitting around a firepit, out in the country, enjoying God’s beautiful creation and growing together as a group. As I sat in the darkness looking at the faces glowing in the flickering light of the fire […]
Authenticity and Honesty
Have you ever really thought about what authenticity means? Webster’s Dictionary defines authentic as “being true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character, with no pretension.” In a world of political correct perfection, this is a tough feat. Being authentic means being vulnerable and risking that what you have to say, or who you are […]
A Direct Connection to Him
“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing.” For most of my life I couldn’t quite grasp the concept of ‘pray without ceasing’, until recently. I’m pretty sure I always had a realistic and healthy prayer life; in that I understand that prayer is not about getting what I want or telling God about my plans. Oh sure, I […]
Frustration Brings a Challenge
Frustration can be overwhelming and is often difficult to communicate to those who may be trying to help. Today I saw a young man, probably 18 years old, sitting in a wheelchair. He had suffered a traumatic brain injury and was unable to take care of himself. The doctors had told the family that he […]
Perseverance Brings Success
I remember back in 1988 when we had the Olympic games in Calgary. The fun all started with the running of the torch and the Olympic flame came right through our town. Right past our house. We, like most of the town lined up with our candles as the runner came trotting down the road […]
The Ocean Beyond
Did you know that mangrove trees only grow to a certain height and then they just stop growing? I am not sure if I knew that before or not, but today I am sitting on a deck overlooking a mangrove patch, and it is beautiful to see the naturally manicured tops flat in front of […]
She Fainted
Our sinful nature causes a constant battle within us, lean on the Lord and He will free you to persevere to the end. Our sinful nature causes a constant battle within us, lean on the Lord and He will free you to persevere to the end. My first concert was Duran Duran. It was not […]
We All Fall Under Grace
If you are one who has been following these writings for a while you will remember that I spent a great deal of time in a dark place of discouragement and fear. Most of my adult life I was in a relationship where my safety was dependent upon my performance, so I lived my life […]
Earthly Stuff
A couple of times over the past few days I have read, participated in, or overheard conversations about earthly stuff and how it can be a hindrance to spiritual fulfillment. I grew up in a large family and all my life I thought we were rich. We had everything we needed, I can’t remember feeling […]
Skewed Perceptions
I wonder what the perception of love was in the days before television. I wonder how much more fully people understood what it is to love and be loved. I wonder how we have gotten so far off track. When we read scripture and reflect on love, what love really is, what is intended to […]
Active Selfless Sacrificial
Today I am feeling a little bit disconnected and off balance. I guess these moments are to be expected from time to time. I guess this is a good opportunity to rest in the comfort of God’s love. Even when I feel unsteady I know that I have stability in his love and his promises. […]
The Best Verse
Have you ever written a poem? I am not very good at poetry but I do like to write from time to time. Sometimes the poem starts out strong and it flows and sounds beautiful, but then I hit a wall and can’t find the words to continue my rhyme. Sometimes the idea is there […]
Worship at His Feet
The thing about worship today is that it has become a ‘song time’ during church. This is not what God intended, and this is not the true meaning of worship. In this day and age we have adopted the idea of corporate worship that is led by worship leader at the beginning of each church service. […]
Perfect Love
Today I started a new devotional, this is a devotional that my future husband and I are doing together. It’s well put together in that, it gives us each five days of personal growth in the Lord with a sixth day to come together and discuss the studies of the past week. This week we […]