The Intimacy in Connection

*Yesterday I had a conversation with a young man who is in his senior year of high school. He is the star player on the basketball team and has been recruited by multiple colleges. But as I was speaking to him I realized he was filled with a deep sadness that he is very good at hiding. You see, he is the coach’s son and the third in a family line of star players. On the outside he seems to have it all together, he is popular, does well in school, and has opportunities that most can only dream of. But he feels like he is walking through life alone. He is lonely.

In a moment of openness, he told me that he loves to play basketball, but sometimes he needs a break, he said that he has nobody to talk to about how he is really feeling inside because everyone, family, friends, teachers, relatives, even strangers, constantly tell him how well he is doing and how impressed they are with him, so he can’t be honest. But he is about to break.

This young man feels that he has no real connection with anyone. He has no safe place to be intimately vulnerable.

We were created for connection and intimacy.  When we have a safe place to experience intimacy we can take whatever comes, and hit it head on. And if we fail it is okay because there is a safe place to fall. And if we succeed the accomplishment won’t feel hollow because we have someone to share it with.

Finding safety and intimacy is not an easy task, it takes work, and it takes time and experiences. Whenever we spend time with someone, and share experiences we build intimacy. It takes time, and there will be lots of bumps along the way, but God did not create us to be an island unto ourselves, He created us to share our lives, our hurts, and our disappointments. He created us to celebrate each other’s victories, successes, and accomplishments. This is human intimacy.

But first and foremost, He created us for a close relationship with Him. People will fail us, people will let us down and disappoint, but we have a creator God who will never fail us, He is always present and always ready.

We all struggle to some degree with intimacy, but if you are willing to open up to receiving the gift of God’s presence, you will find a safe intimacy that you have never experienced before.

Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls. I Peter 1:8-9


*situation slightly altered to respect the individual’s privacy.

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